"ALL METHED UP"

 

Scene 1: The ER, Room 7 

Patient in bed moaning and groaning about vague pain. 

Doctor: (Concerned look on face, standing at bedside) Are you still using meth? 

Patient: (Furrowed brow & innocent voice) No, I stopped using ages ago. 

 

Scene 2: Doctor standing outside room 7, looking over tox-screen report, which reads: "HIGH levels of methamphetamines detected." 

Doctor: (Stepping into room 7, with an annoyed look on his face) So the labwork came back and you've tested positive for meth. 

Patient: (Very serious voice) I have no idea how. Great. They must've spiked my salt shaker with meth again.